More Halloween Stuff

This week has been a fun one for us. It feels like things are starting to be normal again. Which has been nice for me. Well except the puking my brains out almost every night.

On Monday after our appointment, I was in such a good mood that I finally had the motivation and desire to work on Axel's costume, and it turned out SUPER CUTE. I'm not gonna lie.Then on Tuesday we went to Mike's Halloween Train aka the "Nightmare Express". I am so glad we went the first day, I have heard the wait has been insane. We were able to just walk right in and had no wait. I am always impressed with this event each year. It just seems more and more organized and put together. We only got a few pictures this year because we didn't have to wait very long.
On Thursday, we were back to having Story come and play. Axel was SO excited to see her. When she came inside the house, he was in the kitchen, but then saw that it was her and came running or crawling in to see her. He stood by her side the whole day fake laughing to her like he was sooo funny. She was a good sport about it too, and tolerated his excitement. At first she was a little stressed out by our dogs, but then she warmed up and had a blast that day. We did some dancing and singing and of course when Uncle Kory came home she ran right up to our table to her seat, because she knew it was time to eat. We put Axel's costume to the test and showed it to story, and she grabbed it and hugged it and said Hi Pablo, and then attempted to put it on. She then continued to wear the part she could the rest of her stay with us until it was time to leave with Mom. Hmmmm I think I know what to make her for her Birthday now.

Then on Friday, Maddy had her Birthday Party. It was a Halloween Party, and I helped Hilary with it. WE had fun decorating and planning, but I didn't any pictures of all the cute work she put into it. Bummer. Axel didn't have a nap that day because we were over there all day, and he was just all over the place. He had a blast. So much so that he fell asleep at like 6:30 that night. It was fun to see Maddy with all her friends and as her little Social self. She is such a people person.

Axel pretty much thinks these two kids (and Aislynn, she wasn't dressed yet) are the greatest in the world. He calls Nicolas "Cus cus" He thinks the world of them.

Cinderalla the Birthday Girl. So beautiful
Nicolas WAS going to be IRON man but decided last minute that Dracula was scarier, and opted to be that again this year. He is doing his "Scary Pose"
I am sad I didn't get a good picture of Aislynn. She was a very darling Indian, oops I mean Native American, or wait a First American, however you say it now, she was cute and cliche and had long black braids and a feather in her hair. You can kinda see her in this picture below. But my mom just threw together this costume for her, last minute, no trouble at all, because she is just amazing like that.
And here are some of the other kids from the party, this doubled in size but I forgot to take a picture of them all. We probably had 20 kids. It was intense.

Axel had fun playing with the soccer ball in the back yard most of the time.

Boo!

The Anderson family had their usual Halloween Party this year a few weeks ago. I was technically still not supposed to go, but decided to go anyway. I am glad I did, although the result of me going DID put me back in bed for a couple more days. But it was WELL worth it.

Because it was SO early this year (sorry but it was) and because I was put on bed rest right at the beginning of October, I hadn't had a chance to get any of our costumes put together. SO this year we didn't participate in the costume part. Luckily for Kory and Axel, Kelli brought us some wigs. I think one of them was supposed to be for me, but Kory really wanted to dress up Axel as that chick from the grudge that crawls around (because of his crawling) but never got around to getting him a wig, so when we saw that they got a long black wig, we had to put it on him. PERFECT!

I didn't take too many photos tho, but the ones I did take were too cute to not share. So here they are!

Are these boys not to die for? Seriously! oh how I love that Ashdon is ALWAYS smiling, and Krew and Axel could be brothers with those twinner jammies and scary scowls. I think They both may have out grump'd that little Frankenstein :) (Who by the way was the cutest little Frankenstein you have EVER seen)


I had to capture this moment of Story just In AWE of her Grandma. She really loves this lady and I think this picture just shows what a special relationship they have. I also love how Maida dressed up! Her Witch costume was great, I definitely had costume envy. And the fact that story was a little Bumble bee was just perfect for her. Cutest little bumble bee EVER!

We were singing the Bumble Bee song to her, and Maggie stops us and says "That is just gross!"

"I said what is gross Maggie?"

"You're singing about squishing a baby?! Its just a baby?"

Ah sweet Maggie, so smart and always thinking about the environment and the world around you. (Your mother has taught you well :) )

Back in business

Say hello to Baby #2!

Alive healthy and strong. Sorry for the lousy pictures, our scanner is in storage, and so you just have to deal with the snaps I took with my camera of them. But still if you can see what I see, isn't it so darling? Do you see the hand stubs and feet? Makes it all real, and not just the flu you know?

Such a relief for us. I'll admit I was pretty worried.

The good news: The babies heart rate was 182, and right on track due date wise (8 weeks, 2 days)
My bleeding is completely healed now. It was nowhere in the ultrasound. The ultra sound tech was absolutely awesome. I remember her from Axel's too, she is soo great. She gets excited and showed us all these cool things, like the blood going from my body to his through the chord. It was amazing.

The bad news: My "stay-cation" has now come to an end. :( I will no longer have an excuse to have everyone do everything for me. Although it was hard at first, I really started to enjoy my time off and all the extra help I received around the house, and the fact that I could just be like , nope sorry I am off duty, Drs. orders :) But it is nice to have my abilities back, I have felt somewhat useless. I am a doer, I like to go and do, and while I have tried to say things like there is NOTHING more important than sitting here making sure this baby stays put, it didn't make it easy.

I honestly don't think I would have healed or recovered had I not gotten so much help, prayers and positive vibes. So thank you to you all for all your love and support, kind words of advice, and help. We are so blessed to have so many people that love and take care of us. They say it takes a village to raise a child, and in this case that is very true. :)

This baby has definitely tested my faith and made me realize what is important in my life right now. I am not saying it has been easy, probably one of the most exhausting and hard two weeks (has it really only been two weeks?) of my life. I am glad we are all better now, just in time for HALLOWEEN!

our own pumpkin patch

This year we didn't need to go buy a pumpkin because we grew quite a few in our garden. (8 total, but one shriveled up and died somehow)

All summer long we watched as more and more pumpkins showed up. Axel loved going out there. He would pound on them with his pudgie little hand and say "ball ball ball"! It was such a fun thing to do with him. This is probably the only year we will do pumpkins because we have the space in our yard. But hopefully next year we will have landscaped our back yard so I won't have as big of a garden to grow pumpkins in. Although they were kinda low maintenance. So maybe I will grow them. We'll see.

The other day we decided it was time to harvest these pumpkins and put them on our porch, I WAS going to do something fun with them but that was the day before I was put on bed rest so on our porch they sit. Maybe we'll carve a few next week. Whenever Axel goes outside he tries to throw them. (the only one he can lift is the tiny one and amazingly enough it has survived many a trips down our stairs )

Here are some pictures of him with the pumpkins. It was by chance that he was wearing his skeleton jammies that day. :) Perfect for the occasion. (and don't mind ALL my weeds, they were out of control! I hate morning Glory.)

This face is classic Axel. "ball ball ball" can you see it?

This is the one he throws all over our porch. He is watching the other kids... man that kid can give some serious looks!
We also found something else on the pumpkin, (look at Maddy and Nicolas' faces at the picture below)
Sheer disgust! This is what they found. WE found these ALL over our garden this year. So gross. I almost couldn't eat our veggies because of it. I hate bugs. We didn't ever spray, I never got around to it. But next year, I will.

Our neighbor boy told me we weren't allowed to pick the pumpkins. When I started cutting them away from the vines he said "HEY! What are you doing? You can't do that!" Hmmm do you think its time for a fence? Not only that but their dog nearly knocked me and Axel over, and she tripped Maddy, and she got this huge gash on her side. I am kinda glad I don't have to go out their anymore so I don't have to worry about her coming out of nowhere and jumping on me, because she is not a puppy anymore. (oh and her name is Zoe, so whenever we have our Zoe outside and she is outside, she ALWAYS comes over. )

Next question, is it inhumane to throw a snail? What about squishing a spider? or killing a fly? Just wondering what your thoughts are on it.

Here I am

So I am still waiting for my ultrasound, the bleeding came back but I am told it is "old blood" if it was brown, so I have been just trying to do as little as possible, to let whatever is happening get the healing and rest that it needs. That has been hard, but it is tapering off again. Which is good.

On a positive note, I am still so sick with nausea. Way way way worse than when I was pregnant with Axel. So in a way I am grateful because I feel like things are moving along, and as much as I hate hate hate not being able to eat anything, I am glad for it. I have been praying every night that our babies heart will be strong and that all will be well in the ultrasound.

I have a lot of anxiety when I think about Monday. What if something is wrong? Our last ultrasound I felt so lucky, what if this time we are not? I know I will survive but it puts a lot of pressure on me. I know a lot of moms feel this way every time they go to the doctor to hear the heartbeat. I had told myself I wasn't going to be like that with this pregnancy, since I knew how out of my control it all was, but it really is hard to keep that perspective.

I also have been tempted to break out my maternity pants. I know already?But don't judge, my pants push right on my uterus, and I remember waiting way to long to switch to them with Axel, (remember I cried in the dressing room?) But when you are laying down all day anyway sitting in PJ's just adds to the lazy gross factor. But I need to be comfortable. It's funny how a shower and clean clothes can give your spirits such a lift.

Also, I am completely done breastfeeding. We felt like even tho my doctor said it was safe and ok, because I was trying to heal and get a lot rest it was making me quite exhausted. But luckily with a little persistence and effort we were able to get him to take a bottle. Which also has been nice because Kory is the one who is putting him to sleep now at night, something he hasn't allowed Kory to do. So they are getting much closer. Sometimes at night when I am camping out in our bedroom while Kory puts him to bed, I get sad, I miss those nights of reading him stories and snuggling with him. I knew that it would eventually end, and I know this will make it easier for us all when new baby comes, and hopefully in a little bit when I am more healed I can help put him to bed too.

I know this update is kinda boring, but it is what is going on in my head right now, sorry to bore any of you, if you read it I will be surprised. ha

Lagoon!

Kory's work goes to lagoon once a year for their work party, we have really enjoyed this perk of his employment, last year we missed out because we had just had Axel, and who brings a new born to Lagoon? (I'll admit I tried to convince Kelli and Kyle to bring Felix this year because I thought we could trade off and take turns, next year maybe :)

But this year we thought it would be fun to take Axel, and it was really fun. He couldn't really do any of the kiddy rides, so we got to go on a few rides as a family, had dinner with Kory's co workers and went home. Having a kid at Lagoon was a first for us, so it was fun but in a different way, it was fun to see his reaction to it all. He is such an observer. He loves looking at people and just taking it all in. His most favorite part tho? The Basket Ball hoops game, he honestly watched that forever.

But we were so pooped with just the amount that we did.

Waiting in the forever LOOOONG line of the log ride.

Riding the Log rideOur family on the Zoo Train
(I have never done this before because it always makes me sad, but I was surprised how active all the animals were, much more then the zoe)

Hi all

so I am kinda back to sitting. Don't ask

Anyway here are some pictures from when Axel had the flu, he pretty much was in this position all week. It was sad. This couch has had a lot of attention these past couple of weeks.

Isn't that the saddest thing you have ever seen?

When he saw I had the camera out, he sat up and did some posing for me. Such a good sport even tho he was feeling crummy. He is getting so so big it's crazy

TMI

So I went to the doctor on Monday and got some of my questions answered about what is going on with my body and the baby.

(Side note, I wanted to take back what I said about the lab tech, she was much better this time, and I feel bad for being bothered by her, lets blame the hormones shall we?)

So here is the good news, I am sort of not on bed rest anymore, because the bleeding has stopped. My doctor did however put me on Pelvic Rest, and gave me permission to do light housework, so I can put laundry away, and rinse the dishes, and do some light chores. Which I was doing all along, because lets face it that is just how I am.

But what I can't do is mop, vacuum, use any sort of toxic chemical, or be around paint. And to only lift Axel if I need to. He kind of was in the air about that one. Like you can do what you need to do, but just be cautious. He told me I could get out of the house as needed but to not go on shopping sprees. Light errands he said. This all came to such a relief to me, because I am fine with sitting and resting, I can tell my body needs it, but I feel ok to do some things.

So I am on Pelvic Rest.

Pelvic Rest? That is what I said. You don't here about THAT kind of rest all that often, so I had no idea what it was, nor did I ask any questions, (because I never do) But I just kind of assumed it was a step up from Bed Rest. You know first there's bed rest, then pelvic rest, then just taken it easy.

So I have been telling everyone that I am just on Pelvic Rest. Hoping that they would just assume the same. WRONG, instead I get confused faces. And yes, I even told my relief society president that I was only pelvic rest now.

Well, today I decided to look it up.

And I wont go in to details, if you really want to know look it up. But basically I am mortified that I have been throwing the term around so casually. Yikes TMI!

But the bad news is, I have to wait 2 more weeks until I get a follow up ultrasound to see if the kid has survived this trauma. My doctor said, we are going to be optimistic about it tho, because I'm not bleeding anymore and my HCG levels are high, and of course we saw the heart beat, even though it was slow, we will assume that all is going well now.

In the mean time I have had oodles and gobs of help from lots of friends and family, people have brought us yummy dinners, stopped by to visit, taken me on errands, and taken care of Axel so I can rest. I have also received countless texts and emails from people wishing me well and that they are praying for me. I feel so blessed and loved that I have so many people looking after me at this time. So thanks folks, you know who you are so I wont mention names. But I am soooo grateful.

I forgot to mention in my previous post that after we got our ultrasound Kory and his dad gave me a priesthood blessing. I honestly felt soo much peace during, and after, and I know that all will be ok and that I will survive this ordeal. Come what may, I am prepared.

Where do I begin

Bed rest.

It's not fun, many of you have been on it and many of you have not. If you have you can feel my pain and relate. It sounds great right? Sit in bed all day, watch your favorite show while others do your work for you. But it's not, not even a little fun.

I believe that work is a good thing, and that while the occasional rest is important, we feel better about ourselves when we are actively engaged in things and the world around us. Sitting=laziness=boredom=depression. That's how I see it.

Why am I on bed rest you ask?

WELL, if you MUST know, we are expecting ANOTHER baby in June. (not really the way I wanted to put this out there, but already this kid is not about to live in Axel's shadow.)

Anyway, where do I begin. I am 6 weeks along. (not too far, and I told myself I would wait until we were at least 12 weeks to announce it to everyone because soo much could happen in these first fragile weeks.)

But I feel like I need all the prayers and positive thoughts I can get right now. Its been a rough kick-me-in-the-butt kind of week . By far, the hardest week I have EVER had with any of my pregnancies.

Well as many of you know, Axel got the flu last weekend, and it was killer. It was absolutely the worst flu he has had to date. It was a whole lot of everything coming from both ends. It was rough and extremely hard for everyone. Then once he was done, I got it. But luckily for me I wasn't as sick and it came and went quickly.

But shortly after that, I started spotting. It came out of nowhere really. One minute I was running around getting the things done that I had not been able to all week, and then the next I am back on the couch.

At first it was just light spotting, so I took it easy, but then I stood up to put Axel and Story down for a nap and I felt a huge gush, and then the most intense pain in my tailbone, like labor pain. (Sorry if this is too graphic, but trust me I could make it worse) Right then I knew I was having a miscarriage.

So I called my doctor and said no need to order any tests or anything, I am having a miscarriage, I have done this before. However the nurse on the phone convinced me that it would be better to check just in case. (I really hate needles and going to the lab, but I agreed. She was probably right)

So my mom drove me to the doctor for the HCG blood draw. It was hard but I had been down this road before and I knew I would survive it. (I don't know if I am alone on this, but for me it seems like once you have a miscarriage every time you get pregnant you have your guard up right from the beginning. It's hard to get attached, it's hard to feel like you are pregnant, and any planning you wait for proof, and even then its like well something could still go wrong, like with Axel it wasn't until he was in my arms that I felt like wow! this is real).

Anyway, after an encounter with probably the most unprofessional lab tech I have ever met (and we have come across quite a few), I got my blood drawn and proceeded to my mom's car. I wasn't sure when I was supposed to get my final blood draw (you have to get two to determine if you are having a miscarriage that way) so I had to stop and ask the front desk what I was supposed to do. (With my previous miscarriage I was able to just go to the Lab, but since they do it from their office now I had to find out when I was to come.)

So while I waited for the receptionist to get off the phone a nurse came up to me and asked me if I was being helped, so I explained what I was waiting for. So she said, "oh I can make up an order for you to go to the Lab on Saturday, since we are closed, just write your name on this paper, and your birth date,"

So I did and then she said,
"oh I spoke to you on the phone earlier," and then she asked the dreaded words that everyone hates when faced with hard stuff like this...

With her head tilted and her sympathetic brows, she asked "How are you doing?"

Almost immediately the tears started streaming down my cheek, and of course I was like, "No no I am fine, I really am." Then the receptionist chimed in, "Do you need to sit down?" "No no I am fine." All I wanted to do was leave.

And then she had to walk me to the door out of the office past all the pregnant ladies with their pregnant magazines, and their curious sympathetic eyes. It was pretty awful. And not what I expected.

And then we had to wait. And it wasn't just two hours, but the entire night, and into the next morning.

What I expected to happen:

To go home and have a miscarriage and pass it by the morning.

What actually happened:

The bleeding tapered off and the blood stopped. And the pain from the night before was gone.
Weird.

So I called my Dr and asked for the results of my test, and if I would be able to get an ultrasound, because the bleeding had stopped and I thought it was from something else. (I had a hunch)

I was in luck my numbers were good, and they scheduled me for an ultra sound at the hospital.

Well I will spare you those details (trust me you don't want to know) and skip to what you really want to know, and if you are still reading this you obviously want to know.

Well it turned out I hadn't had a miscarriage, the baby was still there in my uterus, beating heart and all, although it was tiny and looked more like a lima bean, it had a beating heart. It was such a relief. The ultra sound tech couldn't tell us much during (which was pretty frustrating for me)

But we did see next to my uterus a big black hole and she measured it and didn't tell us what it was so I knew it wasn't "Normal". I also remembered from Axel's that dark spots meant fluid, so I was pretty sure that was the reason I was bleeding. I asked her what it was, because that is why I was there, to have answers. She couldn't say of course, so I knew it wasn't an organ.

We then went home and waited to find out what was wrong. We found out I had/have a Subchorionic Hemorrhage (And to be honest I am not even sure if that was what it was called)

But it basically is that my placenta tore or something like that away from the uterus (hence the black stuff in the ultrasound) and she said it would probably heal on its own, but that I was to be on bed rest and "take it easy" until we have a follow up ultra sound in about a week, to see if it healed.

So that is where we are at. We are SOO relieved that our baby is still alive and is growing right where it needs to be. However we are not in the clear yet.

So now I am here on my blog in my bed waiting. I am so grateful for my mom for coming today and basically saving my sanity. She cleaned, cooked, did my laundry and took care of Axel, and I got some rest. She also came and took care of me all day Thursdays, I am pretty lucky to have such a great mom.

So you probably will be hearing a lot more from me in the coming days as I try to fill my time with things to do while I sit here.

So if you could, will you keep me in your thoughts and prayers this week, and if you want to stop by and visit that would be great too, I could use the company. OR if you want to just update your blog regularly to keep me happy and entertained that would be great too. Thanks all!

summer is over.

I am sad about this. I love the summer so so much. I love the fall too, except for that fact that it's the season before the one I hate the most...winter. Winter is hard for me, there is nothing I enjoy about it. (Maybe Christmas) but I would enjoy Christmas in the dead heat of July too.

So before I embrace the fall just yet I have a few final summer pictures to post.

A few weeks ago my computer broke, and then we got it fixed, that then it broke again, so I had to go up to the Mac store in Salt Lake to get it fixed. I had Story that day, and so Ashley and Ashdon agreed to come with us to help me with the kids, AND we also thought we would make a fun trip out of it. YAY FOR COUSINS!

PACKED IN TIGHT!

Getting them all to look at the camera just didn't work. So here is one of Ashdon looking
We went to that Water fountain right outside the store. All three had such a fun time! Here are some pictures! We were pretty much the only ones there, so it was kinda nice.

At first they were NOT sure what to so. And they all just stared.

Then Story took the plunge and ran out first.
Once they knew it was safe the boys joined her. And it was just kids running crazy from there on.
Except for the SUPER lame part where they made us stay out and watch some half time show, to God Bless America. It was lame, and the kids were ticked.

We had so much fun a few days later we met up with Hilary and Kassie at the one in Spanish Fork, which we WAY more crowded, and lots more chaotic, but the kids still had fun. Go here for pictures of that day, I didn't take any.