Sunday, February 26, 2012

ch ch change

"Don't be afraid 
of change...
you may lose 
something good,
But you may
gain something 
even better"

I don't like change. In fact it actually gives me anxiety. I would prefer to keep things as they are, so long as my head is above the water that is. I like routine, and keeping things predictable and planned. I get in my groove and want to keep things that way. Planned, perdictable and and to me perfect.

But every so often the universe comes along and mixes things up for me because heaven knows I wont take the plunge myself. Call me boring, call me crazy even, but the less time I spend adjusting to "new" things the more time I have to focus on the the things I love, like my children, husband and hobbies. 

Change number 1: New glasses

I wont even tell you how long ago it was that I had my eyes checked, (let's just say it was in the last century...) 

Why? because I used to own these really cute red frame glasses, and I loved them, wrong RX? You bet, but oh how I loved them, they were broken and cracked, but I loved them and the way they looked on me.  But sometime last year they were misplaced, so I pulled out my back up pair, and wore those for a while. 

But these I wasn't attached too so much, and I didn't like the way they looked on me, and after two babies and over a decade they were totally the wrong RX. So I only wore them if I had to. My mom noticed my constant squinting and was kind enough to get me a new pair (two actually!).

Upon picking up my glasses I drove home and could see so clearly, every sign every detail! It was crazy!

Change number 2: My phone is SMART, almost TOO smart

I text, and I text A LOT. It is a big part of who I am. Every two years I dread/love the oppertunity to get new phones for a new contract. I dread because my phone becomes a part of me, and I hate learning the new phones "ways". On the flip side to that I do Love it because, I use my phones to death, and really by the time this time comes around my phone is on it's last leg. With kids it has been even more so.

Well this time around Kory and I got a really good deal on some nice 4G smartphones, by good deal I mean they gave them to us for FREE, gave us a FREE months of service, and 10 dollars off our service every month for the next two years. Can't really beat that, and we LOVE our phones.

Here is how it went down...

We have been pretty loyal to our cell provider, Kory has been with them FOREVER. I have not really liked them so much. (bad run in with them back in my single days) But we have stayed with them despite my hating them.

But truth is they are the cheapest, and have the best cell service. (I know this because I have tried them all, I think Sprint is the very best, but unless you bundle up with others, it just is TOO much money for us right now)

Kory was pretty set on switching, and so was I, the only thing that made him want to stay was getting the phone he wanted for free, which we knew wouldn't happen with them.

Well as fate would have it that week they had a one day sale, and were giving away their best phones away for a two year contract.

So a couple days before the sale, I called customer service and asked what the "deal" was, and explained our situtation and how we were not wanting to stay but would consider if this deal was true. What I expected to hear "Well we wish you the best!"

The rep confirmed actually that it was in fact true, and she even offered us $10 off our bill each month for the life of our contract to sweeten the deal.

We were soo torn. On one side we really wanted to switch, but that made there already cheaper plans even cheaper. WHAT TO DO! So we went to their sale, and we played with the phones, and we waited over an hour to get our phones, and talk to a rep.

Well turns out in order to get our discount we had to order the phones over the phone, and that the plan we had to sign up for would end up costing us more than we thought with the phones we wanted.  So we went home and thought about it some more. Discussed it and waited for the rep to call us back. And we we're REALLY hesitant, and weighed all our options, pulled up all other providers and compared, and really weren't sure.

They finally called us back and we discussed our dilemma and explained to them our issues, and hesitations. He then gave us over an entire months free, or a year warranty on our phones, depending on how you look at it. But basically eliminating the difference the new amount would cost us.

Then right when we were about to give them the credit card information, (the deal was you buy the phones and get a mail in rebate, the usual drill) the computer froze, he said he would call us back but we would still get to get what we discussed, and worse case scenario, they would just send the phones for free and we wouldn't have to do the rebate. (worse for who? rebates are a pain in my opinion, would much rather have the phone for free without dealing with the rebate)

I will spare you the rest of the details, because after that it got really sticky, and we had to do a LOT of phone calls to and from over the next couple of days. But eventually our phones came!

We love them, Kory has an unfair advantage, he uses the operating system of his phone at work and is much better at this sort of thing than I am. So he is starting to really get to know his phone and what it can do, and it has made his calling lots easier for him.

This is his phone!

Don't get me wrong I LOVE my phone. It is just new and so much more complicated than my previous phone, and it's capabilities are so much more than I could have imagined, but I am getting better at it and know with time I will have adjusted to it. There is just so much to know and adjust to from 4G to Wi-Fi to apps! Sheesh, I have been overwhelmed with this new change the most I think. And of course we had to get full blown protectors and I needed a cover for mine. The first couple of days I literally carried it around in a plastic bag while we decided on protector options. It is kinda stressfull to have a nice phone, but also really nice too. I am sure I will get a hang of it...eventually

Change number 3: Nanny no more
 I have been a nanny/sitter to one or more kids for over a decade now! Can you believe that!! Sometimes really part time, sometimes really full time. But for the most part it has been a big part of me and who I am. But starting next week it will all change! 
I have enjoyed this career choice, one that kinda just fell into my lap and I found I really was good at it, and enjoyed it. Whether it was young infants, preschoolers, or plainly just a driver taking kids to and from school, I have enjoyed my time with those kids, getting to know them, and each one has and will always have a special place in my heart. I always wanted a big family, but as I get older I am starting to doubt if that is possible/doable, so this has been a good way for me to foster that desire.  (By big I mean 10 kids! ha ha)

The lord has blessed me with a talent and has given me the opportunity to use it to care for his most precious possessions,  his children. I love seeing the older kids I have taken care of, and the pieces of me that come out in them, that I like to think that I helped develop. Maddy I think picked up on all my overly tidy/organized side, but I don't hear her mom complaining that her room is always clean. :)

 Putting this post together brought tears to my eyes as I reflected back on all the good times I have had with these little children.

 I am going to miss days like this one: where we went for a walk with all four kids  (Nicolas, Mads, Story and Axel) We walked all the way to Aislynn's school to pick her up. Axel was all about snuggling up to Story, and by the end of the day Story CRASHED on the floor.

Or days like this one: When we went to the duck pond and Nicolas was TERRIFIED of them, because they were not afraid in the slightest of these kids, and kept eating the bread straight out of their hands. Mads was of course fearless and brave and just enjoyed it. (How is it that the boys are so timid and these girls are so fearless? Maddy, Story and now Dani?)

Or this day: Maddy was mimicking the statue at the park, soo funny!

 Or the time I caught Axel reading his book to Nicolas, seriously I about died it was so sweet. 

 Or the countless times we did learning activities/preschool! Mads and Nicolas were great Ginny pigs. Story and Axel definitely got better activities. I have learned though with small children, if you give them activities to do, and keep them occupied they are much more manageable.

Or days like this: We took a trip to Salt Lake to play in the water fountains with cousins and squished all 3 babies in the back or my car for the drive! BUT they LOVED IT! Now if we tried this we would have to get one of those giant vans to do this, not even a mini van would work.

Or the day Backyardigans was introduced to us for the first time! Thanks Story! Axel has been hooked since!

Or waking up from naps all rested and happy!  (along with singing songs, playing peek a boo and dance parties)

Or the COUNTLESS times we played pirates all morning long, and into the afternoon, rotating between super heros here and there. Or the time I took Axel and Story to Costco and sang to them " a pirate a pirate says? and they both yelled "ARRRRGH ARRRGH ARRGH!"

Or my TV zombies! If Story and Axel had one thing in common most, it would be their love for "shows"

 I will miss most I think watching my own kids develop close relationships with these kids. What a great opportunity it has been for them to bond with their cousins.  Axel speaks so highly of Hilary's kids still, and I KNOW Story will always be like a sister to him, and Dani and Gauge haven't had a lot of time to develop a close relationship, but they are so sweet together, and have a lot of fun.
Maddy and Nicolas were sooo excited for me to have Axel. We had countless conversations about babies and they were the best little helpers. Maddy particularly, she was such a mini momma to him. 
 Early on these two have been playing dress up, and haven't quit! I love watching their imaginations go wild as they pretend to be pirates, super heroes, Dinosaurs, SHEPS, and cowboys.
Axel loved playing along side of Maddy and Nicolas, he really did love them. He would cry every time we dropped them off at school.
 This picture makes me laugh because it reminds me of Dani and Gauge, but how sad is it that they are sitting on the hard floor!

 Story is so good with the little babies, she is so soft and loves giving them loves.
And hold Baby Girl, even with puke on her face :)
Sometimes when one was sleeping inside  (Gauge or Dani) the rest of us would head outside and  squish in the stroller and walk up and down the drive way.  I am so grateful for this warmer winter so we had more of these days than not. 

 Gauge and Dani are so funny together,  they just sit and play with toys next to each other. Gauge is happiest most when around Baby Girl. I am glad we are ending on this note, cause it is a pretty sweet note to end on.
 A few weeks ago all the kids were playing together on the kitchen floor, but Axel with Gauge, and Story with Dani. It was pretty adorable.

 Obviously, there will be things I wont miss: The fights, getting up earlier than we normally would, being unable to go anywhere all day, did I mention the fights ? ha ha
 Or days like this one tho: Looking back really funny, but I dont think her mom thought so!

 Maddy went into the bathroom to go potty (oh the joys of potty training) and came back brushing her hair saying, and acting very princess-ish and proud "I cut my hair!" and this is what she did. FULL blown MULLET!
I of course too will miss all the funny things they all have done or said! I wish I would have written them all down, because as time fades, they are all distant memories, and they grow and change so quickly, and before you know it they are grown.  

 Wednesday of this week will be my last day, so we are going to make it a really fun one!

 A lot of people have said, why not just take on more kids, but I feel like it is time to close this chapter, and raise just my own family now. I owe it to my kids to give them my 100 percent, or at least most of it anyway.  As I have had kids of my own in the picture it has gotten more difficult to take on this task, I don't know if it is because I am not getting as much sleep, or if it is because children are energy drainers, but it has gotten harder since Axel was born, and even harder with Dani, but I have managed, and we have had fun.  Just because things are hard doesn't mean they weren't fun or worth it.  I don't even know what I will do with the extra time?! But I am looking forward to it!
But it was a good run, and I am not even sure how I will cope with the change, I still go through with drawls of missing Hilary's kids, and will beg her to come hang out with me. (Kass you've been warned) :)

Change number 4: No Calling

In a week or so I will officially be released as the RS Secretary. After serving over 2 1/2 years in this calling, I am being released. I am both happy and sad about this.

Sad because I have finally gotten in my grove. I know what to do, and I really have my responsibilities down to a science. I felt like we as a presidency finally were able to wrap our heads around our responsibilities, and truly enjoy the work rather than dread it. Apparently that was all the lord wanted from us anyway. He wanted us to learn it, be happy about it, and then move on to grow in an another area.

With that being said, I am not too sad because it was a really time consuming calling, and required a lot from me and was really hard sometimes. I am grateful for the oppertunity I had to serve in this calling. I feel like it really has helped be grow and become a better Daughter of God, and it helped my testimony of Relief Society and it's vital role in all of our lives!

Now I just have to wait until I get my new calling, it is this change that I am NOT looking forward to. I feel this impending doom and uneasiness, and of course I am stressed because I CANT PLAN! I have no idea what or how it will fill my time, so I just have to wait. 

So if I seem frazzled or a little less together to you lately, now you all know why, and even though all these changes are going to be great and rewarding it is going to take 


Kyle said...

That was a nice post.

I can even say I read the WHOLE thing.

I'm glad you're doing what you feel is right for your family. It's hard enough to even know what that is without the added difficulty of actually doing it.

Diana and Jon said...

you are soooo great with kids and such a great mommy! have fun with all your changes!

Jess~ca said...

Cute glasses!! I like em!

I meant to text you back about your calling :) I totally knew it when you posted on facebook about a change coming!You will get back in the groove of things and life will normalize again. I am not a big fan of change either but the last two years have brought a TON of change into my life, and even though I may not have liked it, all the changes have turned out to be good for me :)